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VM: Oh God!!! Because of this Corontine, closed office... Lady: What?? Corontine?? VM: Corona and Quarantine jointly became Corontine. Leave it!! after 82 days, cleaned the office, painted and kept it neatly like a new bride!! God please send some good case!! Lady: Vandu Murugan!! VM: Yes it me. Lady: Did you fight with the painter? VM: Yea!! But how did you know that?? Lady: Just go out and see. Rather than writing sit in line, he has written martyr in line. VM: What!!!! You painter fellow. I will file a case on you and make you get surrendered. Otherwise i am not Vandu Murugan anymore. Lady: Excuse me sir!! Can I search for some other lawyer for my case? VM: Wait mam... wait.... Tell me the details. Lady: Corona is called as contagions disease. Is there and non contagious disease?? VM: Oh God!! is this the first best case? Mam, I am a lawyer. I have studied law I didnt study science. Science is not taught in law college. Lady: Then what will you do to take it as case and fight for it? VM: What will I do? I will ask some good doctor and tell you. Lady: Then take it as case. Take this as token advance. VM: OMG!!Its been so many days that I saw money!! Just let me take whatever comes!! Take it Vandu Muruga!! Hehe 5 minutes please. Lady: Ok VM: Mam, mental illness is called as a disease in Indian Govt. Lady: Ok. Take this 100. Next question. VM: Hehehe then ask as many question you can! Lady: First tell me what is mental health? VM: Here i will tell you!! Understanding own capacity. Secondly, managing the regular problems of life, stress. Thirdly, executing effectively in work place. Fourth is giving the possible contribution to the society we live. This is a person's physical, mental and community welfare. Lady: Good!! Take this next 100. VM: Hehe. thank you. Lady: When will a person have problem in mental health? VM: In life we will face problems, stress etc. It should come. Only then its life. So we feel sad, depressed. Its natural. But if this affects a person's regular activities, then it may be mental health problem. If anyone has such mental issues for himself or for family member or for someone at workplace, if they take Psychological treatment we can cure it. Lady: thank you. I asked this to a doctor. He asked for Rs.500 as consulting fee and insulting me. I finished it with you in Rs.300 VM: Just like this to reduced the operation expenses dont go to mutton shop. Lady: Butcher will make your Kheema out of his habit.
Client: Sir, I need law. VM: Oh Great!! Our people are aware of laws now. Sir, who are you? Client: Sir, I am Mayilvahanam. VM: Dont know who is he and what law he needs. Client: If I go to shop we will know sir. If you give some money I will go and buy it. VM: What?? You will buy law by giving money??!! Client: You just tell me what type you want. VM: How dare you!!! You are talking a person who has studied law and telling them you will buy law for money. Do you know the history of law? Our law is 140 old. Client: Then it will be really old. VM: In the year 1881 law reduced the working hours to 12 hours. Then think earlier how long the worker used to work. Client: Then till that period everything was in favor of owners. VM: You are right! It was a victory to get a law which said children less than 7 years should not be appointed as workers. Just think how bad things were. Client: How come we got 8 hours work and only children above 14 years should be appointed as workers? VM: We got it because of the continuous effort of union. Wait!! How do you know that? Client: Once my 8 year old son got my cutting machine and playing with it by keeping it on a tree. A person saw this and thought i have kept a child labour and filed a case. Somehow i came out of that case sir. VM: Huh!! Somehow we fought and got 44 labour laws and now it has been shrinked to 4 laws. Now taking the excuse of corona they took workers to 144 years back. Client: How come sir? VM: They are saying to work for 12 hours with 8 hours of salary. Just like in the year 1881. Client: What to do for this sir? VM: Unions and workers should decide. ok you said you will buy law with money. Client: Sir if we give money they will give what law we want. VM: I have never heard about it. We can buy any law?? Client: Jut tell me what you want! VM: This will be correct for that case. Ok get me one Industrial dispute act. Client; I will ask. But not sure whether will I get it or not. You are asking for which I have never heard. VM: What else will I get? Cleint: Neem, rose wood, Teak. As you have asked, if we need foreign materials we need to order for it. VM: What?? I asked for foreign item?? Client: Sir why you need so costly one for mosquito net? VM: Hey what are you talking about?? Client: Your wife has asked to fix mosquito net for all door and windows. If you give money i will go and by Sattam( Sattam has 2 meaning- law and frame). VM: So you are? Client: Carpenter sir. VM: Thats why you spoke about Sattam!! Hey next time you tell who are you and then talk about sattam.
Child: Uncle are you a good person or a bad person? VM: What to answer for this? Dont know how they think. Child: Dont you know that? VM: HEhehe Child: Can I tell? VM: Thanks God. Ok you tell. Child: You are a good person if you obey me. If you didnt obey then you are a bad person. VM: She is got used to dealing at home. Now same dialogue she is trying on me. Child: Say Yes or no. VM: Yes or no. Child: Say any one. VM: Its easy to handle Judge in court. Ok Yes. What should I do? Child: Then file case on My dad, mom, grandpa and grand ma. VM: Why case? Child: They are scolding me and saying that i should not play with cell phone. But they speak in cell phone but I shouldnt see that and play with that!! VM: Very good question!! Child: Now you are a good boy. you file the case sir. VM: Sure!! How old are you? Child: What is this unlce, you are asking a girl about her age. VM: OMG!! My fault!! Before that can I tell you a secret? Child: Secret?? Tell me. VM: Your mom given food on time. How she cooks it? Child: In gas. VM: Haaa. We need to put the pan on gas only while cooking. If we keep the pan on gas always what will happen? Child: What will happen? VM: Pan will get heat and get spoiled. Child: Yes!! VM: In the same way cell phone is to talk and get to know about some important information. We should see it only when it is needed. If we keep on talking in phone it will lead to muscle problem. So if you use cell phone before sleeping you will sleep late. The light from cell phone will decrease the sleep. Child: Watching cell phone for long is wrong. Now on i will not watch it.
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Person 1: Alcohol addict Sings parady song about alcohol and getting stomach pain after drinking it. VM: Hey, you know that you will get stomach pain after drinking that. Then why are you drinking it?? P1: Only addicts know that until we are fully tight it will not reduce. VM: Very nice. Ok whats that wound on your face? Did the vehicle bow down somewhere out of influence?? P1: Do you know the names of the rockets which our country launched? VM: Yes I know. Chndrayan and Mangalayan. P1: Those are very silly ones. VM: Why?? P1: My wife has given birth to 2, Saniyayan, Raguyayan. Both will never miss the target. VM: What man did they hit you? Why? P1: If I drink and go home, i should hut my mouth and sleep. Unnecessarily I opened my mouth. They did the work. VM: Sorry to know about this sir. Dont worry sir. P1: Come on sir!! Why will I worry for this??!! There is no place for self respect and dignity in the life of an alcohol addict. In life there will be 1018 things. VM: Sir, thats not 1018. In life we will have 1000 things. P1: Sir i told it along with GST. You were feeling so sorry. Just by showing the wounds i collected money from my wife for half!!! VM: Sir, you can wake up after getting hit by wife but you cannot wake up after hitting on the drinks. P1: Hmmmm just because i am drunk you are telling that old dialogues lawyer sir. I will just finish my uploading work and start my show. VM: Lets keep your show away. You are drinking like this, do you know the side effects of it. P1: Its for me only right. Let it be. VM: Sir, its ok if you alone is going to be affected by drinking. But even your kids are getting affected due to this. P1: Because of fighting at home? VM: Even with that and there is anther thing too. If a person is getting addicted to alcohol, then this addiction will become a heredity addiction in their DNA. There is no problem till their children touch it. But if the kids of addicts drink alcohol just once, they will also become addict like you. Totally, if a person is getting addicted to this habit. The whole family and their next generation will be affected. Now tell me, its not about you and you spoiling your life your drinking. Because of you, your family, your generation will become addict. Do you want this? P1: Oh No sir! I just had it for my happiness. But now unable to leave this habit. I thought this will go off with me alone. But there is alot of things related to it. I dont want it anymore sir!!!
VM: Hello. Caller: Sir are you Homeopathy or allopathy? VM: I am just a Ambika's husband who is saying hello from home. Caller: So you are not a doctor. VM: No. Caller: Other than being husband to Ambika mam, what other do you do? VM: Hmmm I go to court. People call me Advocate. Caller: Sir, you are God!! Earlier I called 2 people and asked are you lawyer. They said i am doctor. VM: Now you called and asked me whether Am i doctor and I told I am lawyer. Caller: I want to meet lawyer. Thats why I asked. You are the God which I was searching. VM: Do you need any donation? Caller: No Sir, i need to file a case. VM: Ok we can file. But first let me tell you my fees. Consulting fee Rs.1000, Insulting fee Rs.500. Caller: Insulting fees?? VM: Through I am Careful, but somehow my image will be damaged. So rather then feeling sad for that, i am charging fees for it. Caller: I will give sir. Sir, my house was robbed and they took 1 lakh rupees. VM: Then you need to complain in Police station. Now on whom do you want to file case? Caller: I want to file case on lock manufacturing company which made lock which is broken easily by robbers. VM: Very nice. If a girl is dying by the flex banned falling on her head, rather filing case on the one who has kept it there, you people file on the printing unit, When Govt is asking you to be at home and telling no corona virus is spread by a dead person people are stoning the people who came to bury the dead body of doctor who treated patients. Now if the house is getting robbed, rather finding him you want to file case on the company which manufactured the lock. Caller: Sir, what I asked is wrong. But i am not a fool to stop the burial of a dead person. VM: Not only you, all those stopped the burial are also people with brain. Caller: Then why did they behave like that? VM: These human being when they gather in groups they are losing the mind that they are single human being and stop thinking. Group rage is influencing them and making them not think. Thats what Sigmund Freud said. Always remember one thing we shouldnt trouble anyone. Caller: Sir thanks for sharing such a wonderful and useful message which is useful for everyone.
VM: Price of weed reduced step by step. What is this?? All these are published in news paper. Son: Dad its not weed its raw materials. VM: Oh yes its raw materials price. Phone rings VM: Phone is ringing!! Dont know who is calling now. Hmmm Let me talk. Hello Caller: The one who is eating Sodium chloride must drink H2O. VM: What are you saying? Caller: Sir, i said that the one who eats salt must drink water with science formula. VM: Oho. Whats your name?? Caller: Sammantham. VM: Mr. Sammantham can I know the reason why you called me and talking unrelated things? Caller: I want to file case on EB. VM: Case on EB?? Why?? Caller: Science says current will not pass through Wood(Called as Kattai in Tamil) So i kept my thumb finger (Kattai viral in Tamil) in current but it passed the current. VM: What nonsense are you talking?? Just because the 3rd finger is ring finger will you pledge the finger in pawn shop and get money?? Caller: Well thats a nice idea. VM: Hey, dont go and show your finger to Pawn shops. They will cut your finger. Caller: Sir, dont change the topic. Can you file the case or not. VM: Your first formula also works for this. Caller: The one who is eating Sodium chloride must drink H2O! That one? VM: Yes. Natures law, Govt rule, everything you need to follow whether you like it or not. Dont go out of the house. If there is need to go out then wear face mask, maintain social distancing. Without following any of this, you say you will file case when you get infected. Lock down is difficult for all. I am not denying it, but bear with it and win this corona battle. Hello... Are you there??? Oh he disconnected the call.
VM: Hello, this is Adv. Vandu Murugan. Rangasamy: Is this Advocate sir's number? VM: Yes, who is this? Rangasamy: I am Rangasamy. VM: Tell me whats the matter? Rangasamy: Nothing. VM: Then why did you call me? Rangasamy: Due to lock down i am at home. So I was getting board. So i thought if calling someone and playing the violin and dialed a number. It turned to be your number. VM: Even i am sitting idle. Lets talk. So tell me what work do you do? Rangasamy: I am not going for work. VM: Oh so are you a business man?? Rangasamy: See, i can do business if there is only profit. But we get to face loss too. VM: So you are not doing any business too. Rangasamy: Yes. I am a house husband. VM: How decently you are saying that you are idle. Rangasamy: Hahaha Yes. VM: Always you are sitting idle but now you are getting bored. Rangasamy: Oh ye!! VM: (Sneezes) Rangasamy: Police.. POlice.. Nurse.. nurse. Come fast. Advocate is passing corona to me. VM: Hey when did I do that?? Rangasamy: Now you sneezed in my ears. VM: Hey wait. If I sneeze in phone how will it spread?? Something is getting fried at home so i got sneezing. Just for that you will call nurse??? Rangasamy: So you dont have Khurana?? VM: Khurana is our earlier Governor. Virus's name is Corona. Rangasamy: Hello, just anwer whatever i asked. Do you have Corona or not? VM: How will I get it?? Since from the lock down has been announced by Govt i am at home. Govt asked to maintain social distancing. Rangasamy: Oh 1 meter distance. VM: yes. I am maintain distancing from hand to face. Rangasamy: Why?? VM: They said not to touch our eye, nose and mouth. Rangasamy: Then how are you eating?? VM: When my son was a kid, i got a dora toy. Its a remote toy. Now a days my wife is sending through it and i am eating. Llife is important sir. A Govt said, Maintain social distancing, wash hands for 20 sec with soap. if going out is that urgent then i am wearing mask. If we follow all these we can overcome Khurana, sorry Corona. (Again Sneezing) Hello.... helloooo.... why i cant hear anything. Oh he disconnected the call. If i knew it earlier i should have sneezed earlier.